It has begun.. My new teacher has invited me on what I know is a new pathway of study. Only going deeper into what I know as my true Self..my heart. I have longed for a long time to be reminded that the intellect can only go so far. The only way to experience the incredible gift of one 's illuminated soul is through the space of the heart. And I found a joyous soul to remind me.
Having completed my six year commitment to be a certified yoga therapist, I returned to my teaching with vast wealth of information. It has taken a full year to process, digest, assimilate and be able to finally feel ready to just live it. It was a much bigger undertaking of effort and commitment than I ever could have imagine and it left me exhausted and depleted when the huge scandal unfolded while I was in India. As many might know, my teacher, T.K. Deskichar's son, Kausthaub, left the KYM because of horrible emotional and sexual abuse allegations. I was in India witnessing most of the upheaval and so I can speak from direct perspective. I had known for years that he was moving further away from an authentic light and I would not collude in his devious need for control. Because of that, I was often punished by being ignored, and shamed with rudeness. I left India, having honored my agreement yet empty and sad that the beauty of my Faith and my huge effort was never appreciated. I am forever grateful for the vast knowledge of this linage and proud of my accomplished work. But my heart had experienced deep betrayal and was grieving.
In March, my dear friend and teacher, Rod Stryker shared with me that I should meet Pandit, the Dir. of the Himalayan Institute and that he would request a meeting for me. Flash forward to June..and for the first time in six years, Pandit was coming to Naperville to visit all of the students that he has touched. How sweet to think I arrived in Naperville in 1995 and it was my first home in the Mid West!! Now, I would finally meet this lovely man in my own neighborhood! What a gift to share a five hour India meal with all his devoted students and to be suddenly included in this loving group. After sitting privately with him, and sharing my deep grief of the past few years, he invited me to partake in this auspicious week of teachings in the deeper wisdom of Tantric study.
So now, I sit trying to put together this sequence of events and digest the awe of my state of being. I am so blessed..and appreciate of all the events that have led to this moment of being here NOW.
I asked to get back to the joy, the wonder, the sweetness of the heart. I have all the information but I want to sing the heart's music of what I know is just love. I want to re-connect to the laughter, the desire of excitement, passion..all the juice that I dance to and share with my huge force of enthusiasm. I know this is my gift and I need to re-nourish the spark that lights up my true illuminated Self.
Always the gift is in sharing these brilliant tools with my students. I get excited knowing that through the heart we heal more, love more, and have more joy in our daily lives. The gateway is found through the direction of the breath..nourishing the organic shakti that rides on the breath and directing the sensation of this current into the vast space of the mind. thus freeing it from angst, tension, doubt, worry and profound grief. To just ride the flow of peace and to be in the presence of one's divine light. I have touched, tasted and now remember that this is my yoga!! The memory has been restored and how delicious that it is all so simple!! Just relax into the letting go...the only way is just fall into the practice and embrace the beauty that language cannot describe!! Love.
Turning our senses to beauty and the glorious nature of creation, provides a nourishing environment for our "dream seeds" to thrive. Just for today, open your gaze and let yourself be amazed. At the infinite ways love is expressed in the world. Know this is a simple reflection of the beauty you are and always will BE.
I will share on my next blog the incredible one on one meeting I had with Pandiji and the gift he gave me.
- Posted using BlogPress from my iPad
Having completed my six year commitment to be a certified yoga therapist, I returned to my teaching with vast wealth of information. It has taken a full year to process, digest, assimilate and be able to finally feel ready to just live it. It was a much bigger undertaking of effort and commitment than I ever could have imagine and it left me exhausted and depleted when the huge scandal unfolded while I was in India. As many might know, my teacher, T.K. Deskichar's son, Kausthaub, left the KYM because of horrible emotional and sexual abuse allegations. I was in India witnessing most of the upheaval and so I can speak from direct perspective. I had known for years that he was moving further away from an authentic light and I would not collude in his devious need for control. Because of that, I was often punished by being ignored, and shamed with rudeness. I left India, having honored my agreement yet empty and sad that the beauty of my Faith and my huge effort was never appreciated. I am forever grateful for the vast knowledge of this linage and proud of my accomplished work. But my heart had experienced deep betrayal and was grieving.
So now, I sit trying to put together this sequence of events and digest the awe of my state of being. I am so blessed..and appreciate of all the events that have led to this moment of being here NOW.
I asked to get back to the joy, the wonder, the sweetness of the heart. I have all the information but I want to sing the heart's music of what I know is just love. I want to re-connect to the laughter, the desire of excitement, passion..all the juice that I dance to and share with my huge force of enthusiasm. I know this is my gift and I need to re-nourish the spark that lights up my true illuminated Self.
Always the gift is in sharing these brilliant tools with my students. I get excited knowing that through the heart we heal more, love more, and have more joy in our daily lives. The gateway is found through the direction of the breath..nourishing the organic shakti that rides on the breath and directing the sensation of this current into the vast space of the mind. thus freeing it from angst, tension, doubt, worry and profound grief. To just ride the flow of peace and to be in the presence of one's divine light. I have touched, tasted and now remember that this is my yoga!! The memory has been restored and how delicious that it is all so simple!! Just relax into the letting go...the only way is just fall into the practice and embrace the beauty that language cannot describe!! Love.
Turning our senses to beauty and the glorious nature of creation, provides a nourishing environment for our "dream seeds" to thrive. Just for today, open your gaze and let yourself be amazed. At the infinite ways love is expressed in the world. Know this is a simple reflection of the beauty you are and always will BE.
I will share on my next blog the incredible one on one meeting I had with Pandiji and the gift he gave me.
- Posted using BlogPress from my iPad
Location:Himalayan institute
